On Being Me, Part II

I admit I tend to be "pessimistic" at times, which I relate to realism. My comments as of late may seem to be on the down turn and they are. I haven't had coitus since May. ( I have masturbated regularly, normal every day stuff here.) I have not had a meaningful conversation with a woman since February. (Talking, writing, poetry, whatever) I am in pain everyday for a stupid injury. Even with drugs I haven't had a good sleep in more than a month. Homecomings in general are depressing. (See this post.) My living situation has not been resolved as of yet. I fear the worse for my truck I bought two years ago that I have only driven for three months. ( This falls into the theory that if I fuck up something that is mine, I will be upset, but if someone else fucks up something that is mine I will be irate.) I don't think I believe in "love" anymore. I have been searching for a god and have not found one yet. My job by the general population is under appreciated. There tends to be no respect for the "elders" anymore. I really don't want sympathy, I just want "you " to fix it. I want America to fix themselves. I just don't see it happening, not in my lifetime. I try to fix something, then another will undermine that fix. It is truly a sad world we live in.