Moving In, Part II

You all know what happens when you move in, right?

Lots and lots of unpacking. I brought in my last load of boxes tonight and hopefully everything will be at least in the right room by Monday. The room I designated as the office is a freaking disaster at the moment. Washing lots of clothes and sheets the last few days and I seemed to have forgotten dish soap when I went shopping today.

Tomorrow, I don't expect to get too much accomplished, fore I have many appointments during the day. I do plan on buying a grill and a TV this weekend.

Next week, I have a partial bathroom makeover and partial electrical upgrade planned. Both of which is not cheap. So that is the reason it is going to be "partial".

After the work is done I will either video it or take photos to update you all.

Moving In

I bought a house and closed on the Friday. So naturally, I moved on Saturday. One thing you definitely learn while moving; you get to find out who your real friends are. I composed a short Five or so minute video of the tour of my home. It isn't really great quality, but I think you all should get a good idea of what I bought. (Of course, this is the reason why I haven't been on the computer.)

Secrets That I Don't Want to Keep Anymore

I have always wanted a hug, from someone who means it.

I threw away the girl of my dreams for a barbie doll woman, it didn't last more than a week.

I wish to dance the night away every day.

I have put up walls around me that I don't know how to take them down anymore.

I like to have my ass squeezed, gentle or hard.

I have never forgiven my relatives that have teased me for being smarter than their kids while growing up.

I enjoy looking at art for hours, I think it is erotic.

I have always had my steaks rare to medium rare, after I went to Africa, I really started enjoying the taste of the blood.

In my mind everyone hates me, I will never be good enough.

I think I would have died a lonely death had I not joined the Corps, I believe that prophecy may still come true.

I want a boring life, but I don't think I am capable of leading one.

Candyland

In my fantasy world that I live in, I would have strawberries on tap. There are joyful and sometimes pompous people wearing tassels on their nether regions. The sun only rests at nine am and sets promptly at eight pm. There is a light breeze of vanilla and it only rains at three am on every other even day. Homes are made out of reinforced concrete and have ballistic missiles perched at the corners. Everyone has laser guided MK-19 (Mod 3) Automatic Grenade Launcher/Machine Guns surrounding their property. There are slow streets and fast ones. There are large and delicious cherries and blueberries on top of every police enforcement vehicle. The red carpet is rolled out for any stop and a blue one for the special moments....

Questions, Comments and Concerns, Part II

The immediate response(s) from everyone who share their thoughts here, help me enlighten and humble myself.

While looking about and learning about others in wants and needs, I find myself in my own catch-22. My rants and raves while at times are very pointed, most of the time are quite general. Most people can relate because of similar personal struggles. It is flattering when someone thinks I write specifically about them; when I don't use their name or describe any detail of a possible person in question.

I really don't write to burn bridges and I don't write to build them. I put these thoughts forward looking to help me understand me better. All this is well and good, and may seem like I am talking about you, but in reality I am not talking to anyone. At least, not anyone in particular.

Foreplay

While, normally, posts like this one are on a completely different blog; today, I have decided it pisses me off so much that I am sharing it with you all.

Foreplay is not:
A board game
Has nothing to do with golf
A secret kept by Buddhist monks
Only for men to perform

Foreplay is:
Explained quite well in The Meaning of Life (For men)
Essential for normal living
For both men and women

Why is it that I keep encountering women that have no idea what to do with a penis other than stick(accept) it in a hole?

I think that is a valid question.

Speaking of me, visual stimulation really doesn't do a whole lot for me and I really need touch. (I know I am giving away all my secrets here, shh.)
All those things that women like, such as:
the running of fingers through your hair
biting of the neck(insert your favorite body part here)
soft/hard kissing
(I really could go on, but I am sure everyone knows what I am talking about.)

I like these things as well. And sometimes, without a little foreplay, I am not ready to go. I am not twenty anymore. I was never a premature ejaculater, so much on the opposite that spectrum, more like the four hour problem that they keep warning us about. Still, I need a little bit more than the parting of the tides. It doesn't have to be TLC, but it does have to be a little stronger than blowing the seeds off a dandelion.

The Ugly Duckling, Part II

My Life According to Google

My life according to Google
Type in the following and choose the first choice:
(I used my real first name in the search bar)

1: Type in "[your name] needs" in the Google search:
Wyldth1ng Needs Rehab

2: Type in "[your name] looks like" in Google search:
Wyldth1ng looks like a pretty white boy.

3: Type in "[your name] does" in Google search:
Wyldth1ng does Frisbee.

4: Type in "[your name] hates" in Google search:
Wyldth1ng HATES TYPOS.


5: Type in "[your name] goes" or "has gone" in Google search:
Wyldth1ng goes to hell

6: Type in "[your name] loves" in Google search:
Wyldth1ng loves to spin.


7: Type in "[your name] eats" in Google search:
Wyldth1ng eats dripping vagina.

8: Type in "[your name] has" in Google search:
Wyldth1ng has guts.

10: Type in "[your name] won't" in Google Search
Wyldth1ng won't be brought down and he and his friends sing about surviving.

11: Type in "[your name] can't" in Google Search
Wyldth1ng can’t be scared tonight.


12: Type in "[your name] wants" in Google Search
Wyldth1ng wants to try out a new truth serum on a volunteer.

13: Type in "[your name] makes" in Google Search
Wyldth1ng makes Gabriella HOT!

14: Type in "[your name] killed" in Google Search
Wyldth1ng killed on the Job.

RevGals Friday FIve: Word Association

Think summer......are you there? Below you will find five words or phrases. Tell us the first thing you think of on reading each one. Your response might be simply another word, or it might be a sentence, a poem, a memory, a recipe, or a story. You get the idea:

1. rooftop
Water Balloons

2. gritty
Arizona

3. hot town (yeah, I know, it's two words)
SummerFest

4. night
Full Moon

5. dance
Sex

For Fun, Part III

Your result for The Monty Python Character Test...

The Knight of Ni

You scored 70 Stubborn, 68 Crazy, 82 Agressive, and 88 Evil!

Apperance: The Holy Grail.



Evil, agressive, stubborn and utterly mad crazy fellow. :D



High Light:



Knights of Ni: Ni! Ni! Ni! Ni! Ni! Ni!

Arthur: Who are you?

Knight of Ni: We are the Knights who say..... "Ni"!

Arthur: (horrified) No! Not the Knights who say "Ni"!

Knight of Ni: The same.

Other Knight of Ni: Who are we?

Knight of Ni: We are the keepers of the sacred words: Ni, Ping, and Nee-womm!

Other Knight of Ni: Nee-womm!

Arthur: (to Bedevere) Those who hear them seldom live to tell the tale!

Knight of Ni: The knights who say "Ni" demand..... a sacrifice!

Arthur: Knights of Ni, we are but simple travelers who seek the enchanter who lives beyond these woods.

Knights of Ni: Ni! Ni! Ni! Ni! Ni! Ni! Ni! Ni! Ni!

Bedevere: No! Noooo! Aaaugh! No!

Knight of Ni: We shall say "Ni" to you... if you do not appease us.

Arthur: Well what is it you want?

Knight of Ni: We want.....



(pregnant pause)



A SHRUBBERY!!!!


(dramatic minor chord)


Arthur: A *WHAT*?

Knights of Ni: Ni! Ni!! Ni! Ni!

Arthur; No! No! Please, please, no more! We will find you a shrubbery.

Knight of Ni: You must return here with a shrubbery... or else you will never pass through this wood... alive.

Arthur: O Knights of Ni, you are just and fair, and we will return with a shrubbery.

Knight of Ni: One that looks nice.

Arthur: Of course!

Knight of Ni: And not *too* expensive.

Arthur; Yes!

Knight of Ni: Noowwwww.... GO!


(music)


Arthur: O Knights of Ni. We have brought you your shrubbery. May we go now?

Knight of Ni: Yes, it is a good shrubbery. I like the laurels particularly. But there is one small problem....

Arthur: What is that?

Knight of Ni: We are now *no longer* the Knights Who Say "Ni"!
Other Knights of Ni: Ni! Shh! Shh!

Knight of Ni: We are now the Knights who say "Ekky-ekky-ekky-ekky-z'Bang, zoom-Boing, z'nourrrwringmm".

Other Knight of Ni: Ni!

Knight of Ni: Therefore, we must give you a test.

Arthur: What is this test, o Knights of..... Knights who 'til recently said "Ni"?

Knight of Ni: Firstly, you must find.... ANOTHER SHRUBBERY!!!


(another minor chord)


Arthur: Oh not *another* shrubbery!!

Knight of Ni: (excitedly) THEN... Then, when you have found the shrubbery, you must place it here, beside this shrubbery, only slightly higher, so we get the two-level effect with a little path running down the middle.

Other Knights of Ni: A path! A path! A path! Shh, shhh. Ni! Ni!

Knight of Ni: Then, when you have found the shrubbery, you must cut down the mightiest tree in the forest... Wiiiiiithh.... A HERRING!

Take The Monty Python Character Test at HelloQuizzy

Questions, Comments and Concerns

Disclaimer: The different tenses of the word fuck are used for emphasis.

Please remember, I like me. I think me is fucking awesome.

Sometimes I just have some trouble hitting the fucking curve balls. Sometimes when I hit the fucking curve balls, the fucking thing goes out hits the fucking foul line pole and bounces out. Then that fucking umpire says something like you're fucking out! Usually, I just don't give a fuck and life goes on. There have been some rarefied occasions when giving a fuck has fucked me worse. The last week has been an example of the special fucking that I received. While I haven't gone into detail of the supreme fucking that I encountered this week; it wasn't necessarily to keep you all in the dark; it is just something I don't feel should be shared in a fucking public forum.

The Walls are Closing In

Do you ever feel like the walls are closing in at an alarming rate? So fast that by the time you feel you could put your arms out to stop it, you are already being crushed. Well, that has been the gist of what I have been experiencing lately. Of course, beer doesn't help, but it sure tastes good. I know my problems are light in comparison to most people. I know that life could be a lot worse. I know that in the big picture of things I am doing better than the majority of people my age. But knowing all of that, doesn't change anything. Luckily, since I have a wondrous and colorful past of near death experiences and total poverty, my outlook on life has a certain "moral flexibility". Since I have this moral flexibility, I know I am going to hell. I have my own name plate with poisonous shards sticking through it. Odds are, there isn't any beer in hell either.

I am sure that Mephistopheles is taking the tally very serious.

Fun with Navy Medicine, Part XIV

I have surgery scheduled for the middle of July. We, the doctor and I, have come to the conclusion that nothing more can be done without surgery for my wrist. Of course, this means there are several other things that can go wrong, which one of the major reasons it has been put off this long. `

The thumb problem will never get better. You could read this in two ways:
Gift from the Marine Corps or Screwed for life.

The Ugly Duckling

As the years have gone by, so have my smooth skin and my pure brown hair. I know in my youth that I was an attractive young man. I know that I hesitated very little before doing something, almost anything. I was easy to please and virtually happy for almost all of my teens and twenties. (I know I am young yet.) For the last few years though, things have been changing. I don't feel I am as attractive as I once was. I have wrinkles and parts of my body hurt almost everyday. I have gray hair coming out in all sorts of odd places. And I really haven't been happy. I have been content, but not happy. I am not sure what has all changed and I am not sure I really want to go back. My career seems to be on hold as I try "to get fixed" and healthy. I hope for the best and prepare for the worst, which is not how it used to be. It used to be hope the best and God help me for the worst. Sometimes, I wish someone would tell me that I am good looking. Just once in while, I don't need that everyday.

It would be nice to hear it, once.

RevGals Friday Five: Beach Trip

1. Ocean rocks, lake limps? Vice versa? Or "it's all beautiful in its own way"?
I prefer the lakes, but must as big as Winnebago or it is just a pond.

2. Year round beach living: Heaven...or the Other Place?
Maybe after I turn 60, but lately I have seen a enough beach to last awhile.

3. Any beach plans for this summer?
Of course, I live in North Carolina.

4. Best beach memory ever?
Elkhart Lake the 80's

5. Fantasy beach trip?
Female to Male ratio 10 to 1, sand consistency of 600 to 800 grit, sun at 9 am, a light 3 to 5 mph breeze from the south, and the rest will take care of itself.

Bonus: Share a piece of music/poetry/film/book that expresses something about what the beach means to you.


Warning: Not for young minds.

Something Funny About America

There is an article from the MOD, Ministry of Defence, talking about how America is not a dream, kind of.

Here is some excerpts:

First the warning:

"Americans are very warm and welcoming, especially to military personnel, but – make no mistake – America is a foreign country, and as far as the locals are concerned, you are foreign aliens."

Next comes the advice:

"Take the time off you need to settle in. Until you know your family is OK you won't be able to get on with your job effectively. And make sure you take your leave and get to see the country. Americans don't tend to take much holiday, and they work six days a week. But it's in your terms and conditions of service, so don't miss out."

You have to find the humor in it. To read the whole article, you can read it here.

Hat Tip to Rogue Gunner.

Future Looks Bright

The selections for Gunnery Sergeant came out today and I have many friends and peers that have been selected. (The message is, FY 2008 APPROVED SELECTIONS TO GUNNERY SERGEANT 110830Z JUN 08, in case someone is looking for it.) I was in the below zone this year(I talk about what that means here.) so most likely I will be in zone next year. This has its pros and cons with it. The obvious pros are that selection to the next rank is possible and moving up the ladder may be quicker than originally expected. The cons are that I need to heal up and do some prerequisites such as the career course and all the normal "green" side training prior to the board next year. If all goes as well as it has this shouldn't be a major factor come next year this time.

The home purchase is moving along nicely and there should be no reason I can't close on the 27th of this month. I think I am more excited to find out what I have in my storage than the actual purchase. All my things have been in storage since June of 2005.

Rant Number 614

I just spent the last three hours on the phone with NMCI (Navy Marine Corps Intranet). The problem that I was trying to get resolved is still not resolved. Basically, I just wasted my time. I have an issue with PDF documents. It appears to the common user to be a software problem, but the technician on the other side said my CD-ROM drive was the culprit. I have nothing in my CD-ROM drive, the document is on my computer, what the fuck does that have anything to do with viewing documents. The technician, if that is what he is called, told me to get a new CD-ROM installed or a new computer. Right, that is going to happen. Let say it does happen they take my computer away, odds are I won't get a "loaner" and the original won't be here for months. At the end of our conversation he said to call back if that doesn't fix the problem. Holy begeezus! So really, he didn't have a clue what was going on.

I Am My Father's Son

I wrote this a few weeks ago to my Mom and Dad. With Father's Day approaching, I thought it may( or may not) pertain to others as well. Even if you can't relate to it, it may give you a better glimpse of where I came from.


I have been thinking about Dad a lot lately. Pa is on his way out the door, so to speak. I have been thinking about how I am now in comparison to him.

Yes, I successfully quit smoking for a year and half but now it seems that I started to buy cigarettes again, so I suppose it was a good run wasn't it? We have that in common.

I drink. I drink copious amounts of alcohol. I say it is for the pain, but it doesn't go away. The pain is still there. We have that in common.

I get hurt and usually wait to go to the doctor. My thinking is why waste everyone's time, I might get better. This is usually not the case, I do end up going in and get "scolded" for not coming in earlier. We have that in common.

I joined the Marine Corps. You could say I did it to get away. I have often heard the stories of how his(Dad) brothers couldn't hack it in the Army and he was/is a Marine. We have that in common.

So you could say I know what my fate is, I see Dad, the way he is now and I see where/how I am going to be. I don't want this life of mine to end up that way. I need to start making changes. I want Dad to start some changes. Dad can be quite stubborn. We have that in common.

Not Wanting to Grow Up

I am a walking talking adult. I have responsibilities. I have duties. I have mutual respect for other walking talking adults. I don't care if you are purple or green. One arm or four.

I do want to be a kid again. Even if it is for two minutes on the tail end of my day. Laughter is truly the best medicine. If I can play and laugh and giggle and make fun and get poked back and get tickled and jump up and down and make silly faces and sing a tune and whistle for jest and splash around and build sand castles and maybe even tell a dirty joke, then I know I lived that day.

I don't need other people, I don't need other adults, I don't need kids. I can be "silly" just with me. Sometimes I do make silly faces at what seems like random times, and others view me as odd. Maybe I still have something I can hold on to. Maybe I am, still, a kid inside.